so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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