there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
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