I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
