She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
