It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
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