Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
i dont even know how to be here
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Randomize
