Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Randomize