and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Randomize
