I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Randomize
