I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
