haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I looked at my own cervix.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Randomize
