You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
