? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
