The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I puked a lego.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Randomize
