I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
