Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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