There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
