Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Randomize