I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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