tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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