Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize
