She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
