You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
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