I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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