so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
