oh god the rape fog is back!
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Randomize
