I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
she peed on how many people?
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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