I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
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