you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Randomize
