You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
