I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I need a beard to bite.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
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