you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
