DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Randomize
