sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
