since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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