Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
