i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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