how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Randomize
