Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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