My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize