I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
Where is the hickey?
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
wow bdsm is so cute
Randomize
