the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
