oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
then he tried to convert me to islam
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize