Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Randomize
