Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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