is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Randomize
