apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
