It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Are we still banned from the library?
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
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