Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Randomize