we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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